I never did imagine feeling so much. My entire adolescence and beyond was void of much of any feelings. Cowardice I suspect was the culprit. Can’t get hurt or not know how to process foreign emotions if you stay steady low to middle. Take the aggregate of baseline feeling and ride that line. Make do. Survival of the fittest. Don’t be weak. Vulnerability is the death of mankind. Eat or be eaten. Never one to try and be the alpha. I know the cut of my jib. I got moxie, I got grit. Always have, always will. But coasting along a subpar standard makes for easy work. Worry about yourself, it doesn’t take much. The natural survival instincts will take hold and you can skate through all the planes of existence under the radar and with ease.
But then we met. Richter scale done took a shit that night. Fucking seismic.
Beauty was a bullshit abstract notion. Creation of big marketing. What even is beauty? I’d tell myself. The world is dreary and full of ugliness after all. Lies spewed to keep myself down so I could never be out.
Then I laid all four of my eyes upon you. Absolutely striking. A sight I’ve never beheld.
Your aura was and still is on a scale of its own. Magnificent and all emcompassing.
You posses the same moxie and grit I find in myself. It’s one of the biggest attractions I find when I think about you. You are a survivalist. Do what you gotta do to make the world keep turning. Together we make a pretty goddamn good team. Sweet Lou and Tram. The finest double play duo known to mankind.
You motivate me like nothing has before. Unlocking all the potential that has laid dormant in cowardice, apathy, and squalor for years.
Your creativity is the best. Whenever you set out to create it always turns out incredible and the happiness that emits from you completing a project is so beautiful. I fucking love it so much.
The first thing I think of when I wake up, the thing that wakes me up in the middle of the night full of joi de vivre. The sweet thoughts that put me to sleep.
Life is the best with you. You make everything so much more fun, and worthwhile. The jokes, the laughing, the brightness that shines wherever you go. Your warmth when I hold you, when I rub you. When I smell you. When I stare creepily upon your effervescents. Fills me with something I still cannot to this day describe with proper precision. It’s all the drinks, all the drugs, all the release times a million. Nirvana. Enlightenment. Who the fuck knows. It’s goddamn incredible whatever it is.
You are my all time favorite. The bee’s knees. The cats pajamas. The fucking shit. My best friend. My comforter, my delicious sweet treat. The love of my life.
The only one I want to spend fiveever with.
The most beautiful woman in the world.
I love you Hermosa. So goddamn much.